Growing Up in Heaven

Growing Up in Heaven

Part One

Crossing Over

1

When a Child Transitions
When a parent dies, you lose your past;
when a child dies, you lose your future.
—anonymous

Death leaves a trail of various states of emotional upheaval and spiritual awakening. The most important thing to realize is that we are never truly alone, even when we think we are. Our loved ones are around to help us through our most painful moments and to guide us out of the darkness and into the light of our own strength. I was recently at a memorial service for a friend’s mother,  sitting by myself in the hallway of the funeral home before the ceremony began. I could hear the muffled music and tearful eulogies coming from a nearby room. Suddenly, I saw the spirit of a little girl about seven years old, wearing a light-blue dress,
white socks, and black patent-leather shoes. She was skipping
up and down the hall. When she went by, she looked at me and
I acknowledged her. She turned around, came back, and stared
into my eyes.
Hi Mister. I answered her in my mind. Hi. Why is my family
crying? Didn’t you die? I asked her. I don’t know. I fell asleep
and woke up here. The lady with the pink dress and pretty
smile is ready to bring me home. There is a pony waiting for
me there. I can’t wait. Then why are you here? I am trying to
tell my mommy and daddy I’m still alive, but they don’t see
me. What’s your name? Kylie. Isn’t it a pretty name? Suddenly
the little girl turned around. Oops, got to go now! The shiny
lady is waiting for me.
And with that, the girl ran past me toward a glowing spirit
on the other side. The spirit greeted the little girl and took
her by the hand. Together, they walked into the light of their
heavenly home.
Later that day, as I headed toward the parking lot, I noticed
a picture on a podium outside a small chapel. I went over to
check it out. There was Kylie, sitting on a stack of hay in front
of a horse and pony. I smiled, looked upward, and thought to
myself: I hope you’re enjoying your new pony, Kylie.
I would soon find out what Kylie was doing on the other
side.
Through the years, I have counseled thousands of parents
who have lost their children. The loss of a child is perhaps
the most difficult of all things to comprehend. Parents are in
denial and disbelief: “It is not natural that my child died before
me. It doesn’t make sense!” It is only natural that parents
expect their children to grow up, enjoy the jewels life has to
offer, and have children of their own one day. This is what
we all know as the normal cycle of life. But when a child dies,
parents are unhappily forced to rethink everything they once
believed about what is “normal,” because their lives have been
irreparably interrupted by tremendous loss—including the loss
of innocence, dreams, and hopes.

From the book GROWING UP IN HEAVEN: The Eternal Connection Between Parent and Child by James Van Praagh. Copyright © 2011 by James Van Praagh. Reprinted by permission of HarperOne, an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers.